|
A Post Divorce Travel Experience
On the stress indicators of social readjustment, separation and divorce score highly on the stress scale. No wonder the rippling effects of these events are felt for such a considerable time after the initial shock.
Although it cannot be underestimated how difficult it is to “let go” or explain the depth of anguish or confusion that follow this final act, it must also be highlighted that we have choices. We can choose to linger in the overwhelming aftershocks and vainly try to analyse all the emotional debates of ‘why’ or ‘why me’. Or we can choose to gradually let go of this powerful grip and realize that we cannot do anything to change the past; it has happened fairly or unfairly. We have the choice to empower and effect our present and our future. Ultimately divorce is an end of one of the stories in our life – perhaps this is sad, perhaps it is a relief.
But above all other things, this is our life – not our ex’s or our children’s or our well-meaning friends or family. It is a time for discovery or even rediscovery, of exploration and opportunities, of finding a new YOU. Who cares if we are not so young or not so gorgeous as when we started that first story? There are a wealth of opportunities waiting around the corner if we have the courage to seek them out. It is time to write a new story and perhaps one that will be more exciting and fulfilling than we could ever have imagined. Take this time to reinvent yourself; rediscover YOU.
Our time on earth is aptly put into perspective by an anonymous “Motto to live by” which was passed on to me by a dear friend :
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand, strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming Woo Hoo – What a ride!”
After living through the tsunami ripples of my own divorce, I am now on that ride! I am discovering many of life’s wonders by travelling. Getting out there helps to socialize again, to put life into perspective and absorb new understandings. Travel need not be expensive or expansive. And if you do not have a travelling companion, travelling alone can be a time of complete freedom as well as a great time to meet people you would normally never have met. There are many wonderfully interesting people of all ages out there on the move and not sitting alone watching the world go by. I once had the privilege of meeting a woman in her 70s travelling the world with her backpack, staying in youth hostels and having the best time of her life. She had divorced in her 50s after raising 5 children, completed a university degree then sought the courage to go travelling on her limited financial resources. In her own way, without her being remotely aware of it, she was an inspiration. Life is what you make of it regardless of what stage you are at.
You don’t need to be an international traveller to get that buzz. Australia has many wonderful locations for new experiences. One of the highlights of my travels has been witnessing and partaking in Indigenous activities in the heart of Arhnem Land or being in awe of Uluru in all its spiritual serenity.
So what’s holding you back …… a weekend away with a short drive from home exploring your neighbourhood, a week away to a new part of Australia or putting that backpack on and heading off to some remote corner of the world.
……………
I am just about to embark on journeys of discovery. I am taking time out of my usual life to absorb the bustling markets of Vietnam sampling the wonderful cuisine of its regions, exploring the archeological remains of Angkor Wat in Cambodia, being a flaneur in elegant Paris, absorbing the spectacular beauty of the Alaskan coastline and the Canadian Rockies or hiking the Tuscan hillsides. I might be on my own but I intend to enjoy every morsel of the adventure.
|